When I was in high school, Saturday Night Live began releasing their first few seasons in DVD form. Considering my love of films like The Blues Brothers (1980) and The Jerk (1979), it felt like an easy sell. Sure, it meant that I suffered through some of Jim Henson’s worst creations, but before the first episode ended, I got to witness the magic of Andy Kaufman.
I didn’t know who this man was, but there was something immediately appealing. He turned on “The Mighty Mouse Song” and would only act out the chorus. Otherwise, he was standing still, looking out at the crowd awkwardly as he waited for his cue to sing “Here I come to save the day!” again. It was love at first sight, in awe of an antagonist whose currency was ambiguity. Nobody knew if he was serious, but you couldn’t help but admire a guy who was that committed to a bit. He once took everyone from his Carnegie Hall gig out for ice cream. The audacity remains a wonderfully curious gag.
As an autistic kid, I latched onto him because in a lot of ways I saw myself in him. He followed his dreams regardless of what others thought. Why did Kaufman once hold a concert where he did nothing but read F. Scott Fitzgerald’s “The Great Gatsby”? Who the hell knows. It’s amusing that he got away with it. I have been just as enamored by people who achieve unthinkable success as I am people who follow their own path, cryptic to the outside world. You have to look in between the lines to find any answer, and even then you’re left talking to Twitter-bots who exist solely to tell you that Kaufman faked his death. To me, there’s nothing as enjoyable as Kaufman’s endless anomalies.
Because of moments like this, I do have a soft spot for the joke nobody understands. Nowhere has that felt more true than when dealing with Andre Iguodala. No, I am not talking about his memoir “The Sixth Man,” which from all reports is an excellent tale of his journey to being an NBA Champion. I am talking about a moment that happened last year that is likely to be scrubbed from history, existing alongside the presidential campaign of Pete Buttigieg. All accounts (including Wikipedia) say that it never happened, but for those who lived through it, they’ll know that it’s as real as it gets.
It’s Andre Iguodala’s Memphis Grizzlies jersey.
At this point, it’s an inexplicable joke. You even wonder why they licensed and produced it because, by all accounts, it didn’t happen. Yes, Iguodala was theoretically on The Grizzlies for over half of the 2019-2020 season, but I don’t even know that he so much as set foot in Tennessee. Sure you got to see Rookie of the Year Ja Morant™ lay it up every night with Jaren Jackson Jr., but what did the man who was considered a sixth man of the year during his time with The Golden State Warriors with their many championships runs do for the team? Did he stand on the court like the wise elder showing better ways to block? Not… exactly. All he really did was coast on a $17.2 million salary for doing nothing but sitting on Twitter and writing things like…
Before I go forward, I feel the need to go back. It isn’t just that Iguodala did not play with The Grizzlies, it’s that his jersey symbolizes much more.
If you’re a Warriors fan like me, 2019 was a pretty terrible time. Yes, they made it to The Championships, but watching those games was like visiting a basketball slaughterhouse. By the time that they got to The Toronto Raptors, they were on crutches. Kevon Looney had been out, but joining that list in rapid succession was Klay Thompson and Kevin Durant. Durant initially injured his leg but came back and ruptured his Achilles. They ran Steph Curry dry to keep things going, but it wasn’t enough. It was a nail-biter, but The Warriors would never be the same. As it stands, Durant and Thompson haven’t even played a game in the near-year since those injuries.
Not only that, but the off-season brought with it a rebuilding period that included trading Durant to The Brooklyn Nets, Demarcus Cousins to The Los Angeles Lakers (he also would be injured before the season started), and Iguodala to The Grizzlies. With half of their all-star team either on stretchers or gone entirely, it showed the quickest fall from grace that I’ve seen lately. Rumors had it that Iguodala was looking for a way to return to The Warriors, but it would be some time before we saw him again.
Why was he traded in the first place? It was because of a salary cap. Durant was the most adamant that he wanted out following feuds with Draymond Green, so there was a need to replace their unequivocal big man. Without him, The Warriors lacked a focus. They decided to go with The Nets’ D’Angelo Russell, believing that he would fill in as Curry’s right-hand man until Thompson returned. The issue was that Russell being on the team meant they had to cut Iguodala, who was too expensive. Was it worth it? Considering that they’re currently dead last in the western conference, I’d say no.
It’s personally frustrating to assess Russell’s place on The Warriors because the season that followed was disastrous. As much as it gave me hope to see their rookies step up and show what the team will be (Marquis Chriss!), Russell was a square peg in a circle. When he wasn’t injured, he was fine at best. After Curry injured his hand, Russell couldn’t lead the team. He played well, but there’s a reason that reports suggested that the team had soured on him by the end. To his credit, he did go to a better team… the second-to-last place Minnesota Timberwolves. The good in all of this is that following their Timberwolves trade, they got the much superior Andrew Wiggins. At least he knows how to improve the team instead of feeling at odds the entire time.
I guess at the risk of never getting Wiggins, it becomes tragic to think how pointless losing Iguodala because of the Russell trade was. Then again, August 2019 was a much more optimistic time. It was a time when you believed that The Phoenix Suns would be worse. It was when you thought that Curry would have a career-best season and lead the team in everybody else’s absence. Instead, he came back right as the Coronavirus said “NOPE!”
Of course, there are many more factors to trading that I’m not going into. Basically, I spent the next few months reading comments about how The Warriors were trash and that they needed to “bring Iggy home.” I wanted to believe in Russell, but I was more impressed by the rookies.
Then there’s the hypothetical about The Grizzlies. Would they be better if Iguodala ever left The Bay? Maybe? Draymond Green spent the season training Eric Paschall to be his heir apparent, and it paid off. Paschall played as part of the rookie team during the All-Star Games. Maybe Iguodala wouldn’t play as much, but he could be there directing the young players to better their technique. As much as you want to see Iguodala play opposite Morant, they almost didn’t need him. They’re currently in the eighth seed and holding their own as one of this season’s greatest wild cards.
You still wonder what would happen if he had reported to practice. Maybe he wouldn’t have left with people like Dillon Brooks suggesting that
"I can't wait until we find a way to trade him so we can play him, and I can show him what really Memphis is about."
This whole incident plays like the Sherry Bobbins episode of The Simpsons where Bart suggests that he’ll “Take up smoking and give that up.” As Homer congratulates him on quitting smoking, Lisa says “But he didn’t do anything.” For a man getting paid $17,2 million while in relatively good health, it’s hard not to look at Iguodala and see him counting the Benjamins and say “But he didn’t do anything.”
That’s his jersey in a nutshell. By all accounts, it’s difficult to suggest that he even wore one even for press day photos. Anyone who bought it as a fan would likely have worn it more often, foolishly going into the season with some naïve belief that he would play. Still, the person next to you at FedEx Forum would shake their head and say “I’m sorry man, Iggy’s not happening.”
You would tear up, realizing that you spent so much money on a lie. Just when you thought you had a championship-level player, he chose to stay at home. As you cried, you would see Morant on the court and pull out your wallet, realizing that you needed to sport that 12 at the next game. You throw your Iguodala jersey to a hobo out of kindness because Grizz fans know what it’s like to feel cheated.
Listen, I like Iguodala. When he was with The Warriors, there was something exciting about seeing him get in there and get the job done. It was painful to see him get traded to The Grizzlies, but I still had this hope that I would see him elevate another team beyond their potential. Instead, he stayed home.
In some respects, you had to admire how he handled the mid-season trade. Suddenly he emerged from the shadows and gave a demand to be traded to one of a select group of teams. If he didn’t get his way, he wouldn’t play. He was a pawn in a bigger game, not actually doing anything of value. Maybe there’s some deeper strategy that shows why his dormancy is important, but as a player, it was disappointing to see him sit out for so long. His bargaining power is impressive, but you just want to see the dude play.
He eventually landed at The Miami Heat and… he’s doing fine. Not great, just fine. Imagine if you started a relay race when everyone is already six miles ahead. That kind of explains watching him right now. He has his moments, but you got the sense that he needed that extra time to get into better shape. It’s also not like The Heat are exemplary this season. It just feels like he’s riding out the season before another big trade with many predicting back to The Warriors.
With all of this said, reading the description for “The Sixth Man” comes with a bit of tragic irony, especially given that this was released prior to The Grizzlies trade:
Andre Iguodala is one of the most admired players in the NBA. And fresh off the Warriors' third NBA championship in the last four years, his game has never been stronger.
The thing is that it isn’t. Love the guy, but as a player, he was just as lost as the rest of The Warriors class. I hope that having a break allowed him to clear his head and focus on a forward path, but as a player, his game has been stronger. One simply needs to watch him playing for The Heat versus a Warriors game from only a year ago to understand that.
In the grand scheme of things, Iguodala’s time on The Grizzlies isn’t an anomaly. There have been other examples of players doing bupkis for a whole year. But still, the jersey fascinates me because I want to know who bought it. To me, it’s a great joke about wasted potential, of a player who was traded because he had too much value just to add no value to his new team. It’s one of those great, inexplicable jokes that I am in love with. I want to buy it just for that one person who stops and thinks, wondering at what time Andre Iguodala was actually on The Grizzlies. I like those moments that are funny, but only after you think too hard about them and realize that it’s a clever commentary on existentialism. What does it all mean? It means absolutely nothing. I cared more about this jersey than Iggy did, and that’s all that matters.
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