There’s so much to be thankful for with queer representation in 2020. It’s gotten much more positive, where characters like bisexual Harley Quinn can headline blockbusters like Birds of Prey (2020) and not have it be their defining trait. Everywhere you look, there’s a growing acceptance for gender fluidity, and it’s made it more of a welcoming time to come out and express yourself. This isn’t to say that gay rights are completely better, but in a time where TV series like Pose can feature a largely transgender cast and be held as a serious Emmy Awards contender shows the small accomplishments that have been made.
However, if you were to go backward, it begins to look a bit surreal how things used to be. It’s only after the point that social change points out the preexisting flaws. Like of course misogyny was everywhere, but why did we accept it? It was just the way society was back then and you can only hope for change. It doesn’t mean that it was good, just that time and context are important when considering anything.
So, what do you make of t.A.T.u., the Russian pop act who hasn’t been seen since the opening ceremony at the 2014 Winter Olympics? To most of you, that’s a name that means absolutely nothing. They had their time in the sun, and the next big act has shown up. However, there’s something important to be noted for their accomplishments. Their biggest is having an album chart internationally, making them only the second act and the first since Gorky Park in 1989. Not bad for a group of teenage girls whose name was “Та любит ту,” translating roughly to “This girl loves that girl.” It was meant to be a play on the English language word “tattoo,” though that’s only the start of their image.
The members Lena Katina and Julia Volkova were each around 17 when they gained international fame with their second album “200 km/h in the Wrong Lane.” The album was a familiar mix of Europop and detailed the teenage struggles that everyone understood. It was about identity regarding rebellion, sexuality, and sadness.
On the surface, it makes perfect sense what was appealing about them. They fit a model, not unlike The Runaways or Bow Wow Wow as this group of young noisemakers singing anthems for our angst-ridden lives, where basic emotions feel heightened. That’s it. That’s why they were big right? Well, it’s true that they had a number of fairly successful songs throughout their career. Unless you’re a completionist, however, I doubt you’ll be thinking about “Not Gonna Get Us” or “30 Minutes” all that much. Sure, they’re fun, but if you’re going to remember t.A.T.u., it’s either going to be for their confusingly punctuated acronym or the song that made them equal parts famous and infamous.
The story goes that songwriter Elena Kiper was at the dentist when the song came to her. She had been put under for surgery. When she came to, she was singing “I have lost my mind!” over and over, believing that she had the root for a song idea. She teamed with co-writers Sergio Galoyan, Trevor Horn, Martin Kierszenbaum, and Valery Polienko to write what would become “Я сошла с ума,” or “I Have Lost My Mind” (later released in English as “All the Things She Said”). It was agreed that Kiper deserved credit for coming up with the idea, though a certain someone wouldn’t take no for an answer. It was t.A.T.u. manager Ivan Shapovalov, who wanted credit with inspiring the song to feature a stronger theme of lesbianism, of two girls learning that they have feelings for each other.
The group did pretty well for themselves. Considering that they were compiled from different groups, having auditioned without knowing that the other was, they molded together to make a big enough hit. “Я сошла с ума” become a number one song for 18 consecutive weeks and sold 200,000 units in Russia.
This is quite a breakthrough given that Russia has been a largely conservative country. As evident by the more recent protest and subsequent imprisonment of Pussy Riot, they do not take kindly to opinions that do not reflect the heteronormative. That includes persecuting those in the LGBT community. With all of that said, things must’ve been copacetic between Vladimir Putin and t.A.T.u. since they got to perform (though not on TV) at the Olympics opening ceremony, serving as one of the country’s most successful exports, especially in the music industry.
It’s crazy to note that as things ballooned, neither Katina nor Volkova had a strong grasp on English. It didn’t stop them, though they weren’t ready for what came next. “All the Things She Said” is a quintessential timestamp of early 21st century LGBT depiction. This isn’t to say it’s the best or even the most subtle. The fact that neither girl was legally an adult, the road ahead was at best proof that young people struggle with their sexuality and at worst evidence that Shapovalov was doing everything in his power to get rich off the world’s perversion. After all, lesbianism in pop culture of the time was seen as sexy, even if that only extended to hot ladies kissing each other. That was as deep as things went with no desire to understand them as people.
That kind of explains the life of “All the Things She Said” as a single. If you were to listen to it isolated of the bigger story, it seems like a compelling import:
And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault, but I want her so much
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame
When they stop and stare, don't worry me
'Cause I'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me
I can try to pretend, I can try to forget
But it's driving me mad, going out of my head
The struggle makes perfect sense and explains why the song has sometimes been considered important. Katina has claimed that fans have told her that the song helped them to understand their own sexuality. Even if neither member of t.A.T.u. was actually queer (there was eventually a controversy when Volkova became pregnant years later), Katina supported the LGBT community, which at least makes their intention with the music pure.Volkova, however, has gone on record that she won't accept a gay son just because they're less aesthetically pleasing than women.
But if you’re anyone, you remember Shapovalov’s story a whole lot better. If you ever want to feel disheartened about the state of music, track down any interview with him regarding this band. Much like The Runaways manager Kim Fowley or Bow Wow Wow manager Malcolm McLaren, there was something devious about the vision. They weren’t going to succeed in music alone. Sure, “All the Things She Said” had phenomenal chart success around the globe, but that’s arguably because Shapovalov had a vision that immediately drew criticism. It wasn’t the lesbianism, at least not entirely. It was, ahem, because of his underage stars.
He directed the music video, which has gone on to be considered both one of the most controversial and sexiest music videos in history. For me as a 13-year-old around its 2002 release, it was an omnipresent video. There was the song, and then there was the video that dramatized two girls feeling tormented by the world judging them when all they want is to kiss each other and run off to a better world.
That would be one thing, but things couldn’t be subtle. Shapovalov covered all of his bases for taboo subjects. The video takes place inside a school, Katina and Volkova shot from between a chain-linked fence as everyone stares on. You feel the world judging them, though there’s a sense that Shapovalov had a smile on his face the entire time. On one hand, the video lacks a vibrancy that American counterparts have to make the setting come to life. There are so many recycled shots in the video that it looks shoddy. However, it’s not about high-quality production value, it’s about what happens next.
The girls were dressed in schoolgirl uniforms, wandering around aimlessly with this desire to be left alone. Many have suggested that this was in reference to American counterpart Britney Spears, whose "...Baby One More Time" elevated the teenage singer in a similar wardrobe. The passion is hot, even as the despair from outside radiates in. However, it doesn’t stop at the uniforms. No, it has to be raining so that each of them are soaked to the bone, barely avoiding transparent shirts. Then there’s the moment that the song is clearly building towards. After experiencing so much repression, the two kiss each other as the chorus picks up again, throwing them into an audible state of ecstasy.
It’s a moment that lives on in controversial infamy. There were so many angles to take this video, and the less icky one was questioning the authenticity of their lesbianism. The song itself was divisive as to whether it was even good, but the video captured so much attention. Certain music channels banned it for obscenity, and then there was the question as to whether it was an act.
Sad to say, but it’s easy to think of this song as exploitative and false when remembering their live performances around this time. It’s true that faux-lesbianism was more en vogue around this time, but even then it felt like wherever they went they existed for leering perverts to watch them kiss and cheer them on. It was a moment that usurped the song in the public’s consciousness.
This was only outdone by the fact that Shapovalov was so open about his intention. Many saw him as exploiting the underage girls in ways that feel especially apparent in the music video. There are low angles that are clearly meant to be suggestive, and the wet girl was always seen as a sexy trope. Whether t.A.T.u. actually felt like their song was genuine (Katina would later claim that she saw her time in the band as an actress playing a role), the public perception was that it was breaking a lot of decency laws regarding the protection of children. Sure it helped their publicity, but was it all worth it?
That may be the biggest issue with “All the Things She Said.” If you listen to the song now, it’s fine. There’s not a lot that stands out besides the passionate cries for love. However, any lasting impact of this song comes more from how audiences saw sexuality in 2002, especially when it was manufactured for young performers who probably weren’t in control of their own image. Anyone who remembers t.A.T.u. remember that kiss. I personally remember a Mad TV performance where they were cheered on as they kissed. I have no idea if it was seen an act of queer acceptance, or what it likely was: sexy girls kissing is hot.
That isn’t to say that the song is totally disposable. The way that it paints t.A.T.u. as outsiders in their story still comes across as tragic, and you feel this deeper sadness as they cry “Will I ever be free?” The message still rings true for those questioning their own identity, but thanks to Shapovalov’s desire for a quick buck, it can’t be taken as genuine. Maybe even if it was given the ginger treatment it would’ve still been misconstrued. It’s hard to say, but that is why this song is empowering, disingenuine, or gross depending on how you look at it.
In the time since there have been remixes made. It’s been used in the TV series Birds of Prey and Legend of the Heavenly Stone. WWE wrestler Victoria used it as her walk-in music. There’s even been controversy as to whether Katy Perry ripped the band off on her song “E.T.” Even if the band didn’t have much of a legacy after that, they were still somewhere in the consciousness, serving as the one Russian import to leave a lasting impression. As to what the true meaning and intention of the song remains a fascinating anomaly, but it has permeated culture in small ways.
What can be said is that looking back at it is fascinating how society talked about gender fluidity around the turn of the century. It seemed like something more rudimentary and inhuman, serving more as a form of titillating entertainment than deeply complex. Even when the signs were right there (the song), we were caught up in something more basic (the video). Humanity hasn’t changed its visual mentality in the near two-decades since, but how that image is created has evolved into something greater. Would a t.A.T.u.-style band stand a chance in 2020? It feels like we all care too much about each other to let it happen quite like that, at least on a mainstream level.
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