Over the course of my adult life, few months have felt as strange to classify as August. There’s very little that can honestly define it except collective burnout. Whereas June and July have the benefit of being the apex of summer, August is that time where everyone is starting to wrap things up and look forward to whatever The Fall has in store. You’ve done what you wanted to do and all that’s left is to twiddle one’s fingers until September rolls around and everything starts to click for the concluding chapters of the year. This is true even in a pandemic-free year, where cinemas are packed with the proverbial B-Movies of Hollywood for franchise titles they didn’t expect to break a billion but needed to release just to break even.
To be totally honest, my August has been one of the least eventful periods for me personally. Whereas July was full of these small eventful moments, I cannot recall much from the past few weeks that are necessarily groundbreaking, worthy of bringing notice on The Memory Tourist. I haven’t gone anywhere significant. August is a moment to relax and catch up on everything that I missed out on. I read a few Tom Perrotta books and listened to a bunch of Sterlin Harjo interviews because Reservoir Dogs is easily my favorite new TV series in a few months (the same can’t be said for FX’s other “On Hulu” series American Horror Stories, which is so bad). I just love how it builds its world and the characters who inhabit it are so fresh and new.
In some respects, I wished that there was more to encapsulate August, to make it more meaningful to me. Then again, it’s difficult to fully assess what to do when The Delta Variant of Coronavirus is running rampant and fire season continues to overwhelm. How do you be a good person and live an eventful life when so much of the world feels predicated on distance? It’s a bit isolating, even as I’ve found solace talking to people on Twitter and finding better ways to cope with the stress. Still, it’s quite a time to be alive when so much news is breaking and the world makes September feel like it will be a totally different place, for better or worse.
There are small things that seem crazy to me. We are two weeks away from the 20th anniversary of The 9/11 World Trade Center Attacks. It remains such a pivotal moment in Modern American History, and it’s strange to remember how vivid that discovery was: a sense of confusion as I looked at the TV and didn’t understand what that plane was doing in the tower. I watched people jump, firefighters dig through the rubble, and tried to make sense of what just happened. I was 12-years-old, only a month into my time at a new school (we canceled back to school night because of this), and really had no idea what to expect. I just wanted to watch cartoons, to have a normal life. The severity of the moment was obvious, but it was lost on me at the same time as I heard that Alan Jackson song.
Given that I’ve tried to find hope in tragedy, I think the art that comes to symbolize that moment for me are strangely opposite ends of the spectrum. There’s Zero Dark Thirty (2012), which is the quintessential Post-9/11 movie for me if for how it captures our desperation for answers at any cost. Sure the ending is ambiguous and maybe hollow, but it speaks to a drive that has lasted until 2021 when Joe Biden began pulling troops out of Afghanistan. We want the bow on the package, the closure. On the flip side is Come From Away, which captures the humanity that I look for, where people put aside differences and provide shelter from the storm. Thankfully, there will be a recorded version of the show out on September 10 on Apple TV+, and I highly recommend you watch it if not that Friday, then sometime in conjunction. It is honestly the greatest piece of art related to this moment that I’ve ever seen.
But hopefully, I will get into more of that as 9/11 approaches. For now, I realize that a lot of my August has been looking forward. On a smaller scale, I’m looking forward to the Dear Evan Hansen (2021) movie and have been eagerly following the news surrounding Jeopardy! replacement host.
To be completely honest, the Mike Richards scandal becomes crazier the more that you read up on it, notably that most if not all of the misogynistic and racist comments he made on his RanDumb podcast were promoted as being from the producer of The Price is Right. Already, not a terribly good sign. I understand that Mayim Bialik has her conflicts as well, but to me, she feels like a better fit for host for the time being.
It’s also been a time of unfortunate cancellation, as two of my current favorite shows that have made 2021 more tolerable are disappearing soon. This past week, HBO announced that Betty will be ending after its second season. While it was always at best a hangout show, it mellowed me out after hard days and I just love how Crystal Moselle captures the fluid motion of a skateboarder. Nothing could be happening and it would still feel like the most sublime show ever created. While she also did a less-than-stellar Netflix Untold doc this month as well, I still have hope that she has a very bright future wherever it takes her.
The other is Everything’s Gonna Be Okay. As anyone who has dealt with me knows, the show came to mean a lot to me. First, it was because of Kayla Cromer, who became the first openly autistic lead in a sitcom. I loved Matilda and found her journey to be so rewarding. To see an autistic person not be othered has a catharsis you cannot understand until you really do media studies, where you realize how pigeonholed we sometimes are. Matilda was free, capable of her own agency and choices. I understand that this was due to low ratings, but part of me wanted to keep it going, especially as it delved into asexuality with Drea and gave me confidence that people in The Ace Community are capable of being in stable, loving relationships. I know it sounds basic, but when representation is that low, sometimes the simple things are powerful. I’ve reached out to the cast and shared my opinions, though no replies. Josh Thomas says he’s working on other shows, so I hope there’s something even greater out there.
On a quick side note, there is currently a Kickstarter for a movie directed by Guillermo Diaz (yes, the actor) called Dear Luke Love Me that promises to be about asexuality in a respectful way. If you want, feel free to check it out and support however you can. Also, there’s this great little podcast called Sounds Fake But Okay that I’ve been enjoying if you want further exposure to the community (I personally want to check out some of their older episodes because a lot of their stuff has been pretty affirming).
Since August has been at times lacking anything of significance, I have also been getting into more music lately. Billie Eilish’s “Happier Than Ever” is shaping up to be a grand masterpiece given time. The Go! Team’s “Get Up Sequences Part One” is honestly so infectious and “World Remember Me Now” is a fun song to blast when I’m feeling down. Then of course there is Lorde, whose “Solar Power” just came out and it’s even more upbeat affirmations. While it’s my third favorite album of hers, I love the positivity, the push to find something greater in life than, ahem, melodrama. I will share more thoughts very soon on it.
I’ve also been on a bit of a Liz Phair kick lately. I don’t talk about it much, but “Exile in Guyville” is one of those records that got me through early college days after learning about it in Spin Magazine. It’s a great record and it’s been in my rotation a lot lately. It makes me want to do what I probably should’ve done a decade ago: listen to any other one of her albums. I checked out “Whitechocolatespaceegg,” and I’m proud to say that it’s also really good. “Polyester Bride” gets stuck in your head so easily. I haven’t heard “Whip Smart” and I’m nervous about any Post-2000 work, but I heard “Soberish” was pretty good. I don’t know that she’s my favorite in the way that Lana Del Rey or Courtney Barnett is, but I’ve found her delightful to listen to.
Side note: I really didn’t like The Suicide Squad (2021) movie, but I am a big fan of has been supervillains, and Batman has a ton that is kind of great. I want to take the current popularity of Polka Dot Man to get some memorabilia of him, if just a small statue, because boy does he fit my aesthetic down to his insecurities about not being as great as he probably should be. Also, given that David Dastmalchian has openly discussed his experience with mental health and depression during the press junkets, I kind of respect his read of the character all the more.
To close out this entry, I thought that I would share some truth. While I haven’t honestly gone much of anywhere or done much of anything, I will admit that this is in part because I have OFFICIALLY returned to school for my second semester. I’ve been doing all of the familiar prep work of getting finances in order, getting parking passes, and making sure I have all of the books in the right editions sitting in a pile by my bed. Yes, the life of an English major is exciting I guess because I’m about to spend a whole bunch of time (for class and in personal career) reading and writing. I have a book that I want to release in three months. I have the desire to release short stories. How will I balance that with the rest of my education?
The good news is that I’ve been allowed to attend class on campus for the first time. Given that Cal State Long Beach is my dream school, it’s been exciting to be considered a student on the campus. I took a walking tour last week and have officially attended at least one class in person. It’s so rejuvenating to be surrounded by people eager to learn, wanting to better their own lives. I think online classes are fine, but it’s always the equivalent of looking through a window. You can only assume that you connect with what’s on the other side.
The only downside is that most student parking is on the outskirts of campus and my class is at the other end… at the top of the hill. Still, a solid 15 minute walk. I miss having that small piece of order. Anyway, I will be learning a whole lot about theater, poetry, and short stories this semester. Expect me to have a dozen or so new favorites by the time I part for Christmas Break!
Also, the Dear Evan Hansen movie soundtrack is good so far
I don’t know. While August has been in some ways my least eventful month, it has been one that is starting to show where I plan to end up this Fall. I have movies, anniversaries, releases, classes to look forward to. I have meaning and purpose in my life to provide focus. I can only hope that this continues to be true and that I keep finding ways to move forward. While I’m not always in the best of moods, I’ve been doing a lot better and I can only hope this focus will provide some ease in the struggle. For now, I just have to keep looking to the future and hope that I don’t fall behind. That, and I really hope Dear Evan Hansen is as masterful on film as it is onstage. I don’t think it will be, but I cannot wait to find out!
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