As the old expression goes… time, March IS on. Show us what you got. We are officially a quarter of the way through 2024, and I have to believe something of note has happened in that time. Don’t get me wrong. Something meaningful happens every day. The only question is whether we stop and take time to notice the beauty around us.
That is what I’ve been trying to do in March. A lot of my favorite memories come from simply going on walks. Sure, there’s a repetitive and trivial nature to a lot of them, but every now and then I found myself engaging with the world in unexpected ways. One day I got to see a helicopter fly over the horizon only to hover around a housing complex on my walk path. A dozen cop cars blocked the street and, while I never found out the specifics, there is something to seeing a bust as a background detail. Similarly, I went for a walk not expecting it to rain and not only did it rain, but lightning kicked up. Was it very dumb to keep going? Undoubtedly.
I also found myself visiting my old college campus for the first time in close to a decade. For as many lovely memories as I had at Cypress College, the reality is that it symbolizes the moment I dropped out of school in 2014. I didn’t have the passion necessary to do even the simplest classes. In some ways, I still feel like a failure in the eyes of the friends I met there. A lot of amazing people worked in the journalism department, and I have to believe they’re all onto great careers. As for me, I think something about being “the dropout” friend still weighs on me and even now with a B.A. from CSULB, I’m somehow lesser.
Anyway, I was there to see the school’s production of The Prom. I had missed it at Ahmanson two years prior and was really wanting to see it. Even the venue dragged up memories as the classrooms next to the auditorium were where I had my only theater courses with one of the nicest teachers. In some respect, I have a lot of admiration for the school still and think it’s a wonderful place, but somehow amid the nostalgia is that lingering disappointment that this place mostly marked a misstep on my journey. It now stands as the only school where things didn’t work out.
And yet, I didn’t feel discomfort there. It was serene and nice. They have a Sunday swap meet, so I got to see the place packed with people wandering around the parking lot where I parked hundreds of times before. The campus still looks great and the enhancements help to give it personality. I think after being at CSULB, it also feels small, which is an interesting phenomenon given how many hours I spent walking around there. Finally, I think the one thing that I am relieved to share is that I have only seen two shows at Cypress College. It’s safe to say that I loved The Prom leaps and bounds more than Rent. If nothing else, I think The Prom makes the most sense on stage and feel like other adaptations don’t quite capture its appeal accurately.
Apologies for something that reads as tangential, at least to me. I got a little emotional walking around Cypress College and felt that it was important to mention. Coming back a success probably took some of the sting away. Still, in a month where I found myself visiting a lot of campuses, somehow this was the one that meant the most to me.
I also visited Long Beach in the waning days of the men’s basketball season. To provide some context, THE BEACH MADE IT TO MARCH MADNESS! I understand that we lost by 20 to Arizona in a very predictable outcome, but there was something thrilling to watching the journey going back to The Big West Tournament. Given that we were coming off a five-game losing streak, I had lower expectations than how things wound up. Instead, we proved that we could get the job done. It’s our first time at March Madness since 2012, and I can only hope we can build on things from here. I’m going to miss coach Dan Monson, but at least I got to see him for six excellent seasons, through highs and lows, leading the talented team to something that’ll hang in The Pyramid for the rest of time.
Also, it goes without saying but men’s volleyball is back to being number one. There were a few stumbles throughout the season, but as of this writing we are back to the top nationally! With that said, it got me to watch Grand Canyon University games and… they have a great team. Not as good as Hawaii, but we got some healthy competition going into the tournament in the not-too-distant future.
Back to March Madness, I am writing this as a bunch of games are playing in the background. The past few days have really made me understand the mentality of somebody like Howie Ratner. You’re caught up in the miracle plays and predicting the most insane nonsense. Given that my team never makes it past the first round, I often find myself latching onto underdogs by instinct. This year it was Oakland because I just loved how Jack Gohlke played against Kentucky. Even in their loss against North Carolina, I was impressed with his shooting, and I hope to catch some of his plays going forward. Who am I rooting for going forward? I don’t know… college basketball is something I mostly enjoy on a local (read: Big West) level, so it all feels impersonal at this point. However, I am curious to see Juju Watkins from USC. Otherwise, I am rooting for Tennessee for a few reasons. The first is that I’ve bought a handful of used textbooks that came from them. The other is that they have such cute wardrobe and I love the orange checkered pattern. Also, the coach wore a cardigan last year that I really liked. I don’t know, I feel like our fashion senses are in neighboring circles.
For as addictive as the spiral of basketball has been the past few weeks, I think it would be easy to forget how the month started. In California, we had a small election. With some regret, I forgot to submit a ballot. This is less concern over the bigger candidates and more the initiatives that were being voted on. For as much as I remain critical of our political leaders, I think it’s important to voice your opinion where you can. Of course, Joe Biden was going to win. I’m not worried about that (well, not in that way). I just want to believe people can be put into office who will do something meaningful.
Because it’s difficult to watch The State of the Union and totally feel enthusiastic about the direction things are going in. For all the optimistic jargon, I found the evening constantly derailed by the president essentially doing crowd work at a night club. Some could see it as him being vibrant and capable, but it just informed me how much these people would rather argue about doing anything than doing anything. Don’t get me wrong. I am sure Biden has done a lot of significant things for the country. However, I’m wishing we could get some new ideas in there from younger minds. The other side is especially disheartening. Watching our national anthem used to defend the rights of January 6 terrorists only reaffirms why we shouldn’t be quick to naively say “This is the greatest nation.” It does a lot right, but as we fund wars but can’t give citizens decent livings, I think the best that can be said is that we need to have an intervention with our absentee father.
But I suppose the one detail that bothered me the most in The State of the Union was that for all of the achievements and discussion of serious wars, Biden couldn’t be bothered to properly address LGBTQIA+ issues. Hearing him tell transgender people that “we got your back” felt like an empty gesture for no other reason than he used that line last year without any further commentary. In 2024, queer rights continue to be suppressed and the trans community is experiencing a genocide. Government buildings are refusing to fly the pride flag for no other reason than bigotry. Young people are scared to attend school for safety reasons. Things are continually getting scarier and scarier. You dedicated a whole extra line for a damn joke about a bag of chips, but queer issues get reduced to half a bar? As the most powerful man in America, you got to do more than rhetoric.
I don’t know. I recognize that a lot of issues are going on concurrently. We are living with the consequences of a hateful society that’s emerged in the past decade. It’s hard to feel optimism going into the November election. Recently, I went to a one woman show about three first ladies and it reminded me how much I love American history. There was a time when I actively consumed monthly updates on the elections. Even now, I’ll rewatch old debate footage whenever CPAC plays them because I like to determine what the appeal of certain candidates were. I think 2020 was the first time I actively disengaged with anything because it was ugly and cruel. It wasn’t fun anymore. Let’s just say that 2016 wore me out that much. Even with all this, I am scared of moving forward, but I’m also curious of what this will all look like in the rearview mirror. I have to believe we’ll reach a point of even keel, and things won’t be “so” bad. Even as respected journalistic divisions are being shut down, I pray that there will be a way of getting truthful, unbiased news. As I like to say, I force myself to be an optimist.
Because it’s a time when culture wars are getting satirical. The amount of time I’ve seen complaints about Sydney Sweeney’s breasts is confusing. Don’t get me wrong. I get the appeal of attractive people, but the idea that the people who want to control women’s bodies are now declaring those same bodies “anti-woke” simply for being seen is baffling. I don’t know. That’s maybe why I don’t go on social media as much. The debate around sex is confusing. Meanwhile, I’m the asexual going to see Drive-Away Dolls (2024) and Love Lies Bleeding (2024) and appreciating that we’re in a very strange, kinky era. This country is weird and I’m grateful that I don’t have to engage in these conversations. It seems like a giant waste of time.
On a side note, it feels like a decent time to share one thing I’m personally mad about. Dylan Mulvaney. No, it’s not because of anything she has done. Apparently she was at my school this past week for an event. However, it was student only and because I never thought to get a valid CSULB student I.D., I can’t even buy a ticket. It sucks because she’s been doing odd events around Southern California and I was excited to finally get a chance to see her after I caught her in a production of Book of Mormon back in 2021. For what it’s worth, I still sometimes run across her on TikTok, and the positivity can be rather motivational. I understand many decry the app for sensible reasons, but I think it’s an issue most social media has and is not TikTok’s fault alone. I’ve discovered a lot of amazing people through The Clock App who have made my life better. That’s just how things go.
Though speaking of films, we also had The Oscars. I am proud to say that this is one of the greatest Best Picture line-ups of the 21st century. I don’t actively dislike any of the films and even if Oppenheimer (2023) was my sixth favorite movie, I am very happy to see Christopher Nolan finally become a winner. I am the cliché Millennial who saw The Dark Knight (2008) over and over in theaters and immediately rooted for Nolan to take over the world. I wanted to see him win for Inception (2010) and then again for Dunkirk (2017). There’s a lot of reasons that I am supportive of him and find this moment thrilling. As a whole, I am not opposed to many of the winners and actually consider Emma Stone’s win for Poor Things (2023) to be one of my favorite Best Actress winners at least in my adult lifetime. The fact it showed up so overwhelmingly fills me with joy.
Another thing that fills me with joy is seeing Jane Schoenbrun getting a potential chance of a big theatrical release. One of my favorite experiences of the year so far was seeing the trailer for I Saw The TV Glow (2024) on the big screen. Hearing Yeule in surround sound as those lavish images flew across the screen was amazing. I wish more cinema was allowed to be this unabashedly strange. I’m grateful to have Schoenbrun being allowed to make art like this. If you haven’t, I highly recommend giving We’re All Going to the World’s Fair (2022) a chance. It’s a nice little gem that will hopefully get you in the right head space for what’s to come.
I also want to briefly mention that I have seen Dear Luke Love Me. While I am restricting myself from sharing opinions on the film itself, I am happy to have been involved with it even just as a backer. I may have provided zero input otherwise, but it’s a significant part of my journey to self-acceptance as an asexual and am glad to see it winning awards at film festivals. Based on a Zoom meeting that I’ve been part of, I can say that I think the cast and crew have their heart in the right place and am hoping this helps Mallie McCown continue to get interesting work in the future. It’s definitely personal and I think speaks very well of her experiences.
Before closing out the media section of this, I want to touch on one album that has quickly jumped up the ranks of my favorite albums for 2024. The day I published last month’s entry, Hurray for the Riff Raff released their new album “The Past Is Still Alive.” What I didn’t expect was for it to love it almost immediately. I have been a big fan of their previous work and find this to be another hit. The feeling of Americana and venturing into the great unknown is thrilling. I love how emotional and personal the experience is, and I turn to it anytime that I need a quick pick me up.
While no record has necessarily matched the same infatuation yet, I want to quickly highlight some that I encourage everyone to check out. My favorite surprise so far is Frances Chang’s “Psychedelic Anxiety” which sounds exactly like that title. It’s perfectly trippy while also delving into painful experiences that build these surreal soundscapes. Much like Quadeca’s also great “Scrapyard,” it is a great mood piece. Adrienne Lenker’s “Bright Future” is also a lovely little record and further proof that this is probably going to be the year I get into folk and country music. Given everything I’ve talked about, Madi Diaz’s “Weird Faith” has been a nice record of experiencing young love amid the backdrop of religion. If you want more, Katy Kirby’s “Blue Raspberry” is another charmer. If you’re looking for more of an innocuous party record, Schoolboy Q’s “Blue Lips” is hella fun. Not perfect or inspired lyrically, but it’ll get you moving.
Moving towards the tail end, I want to mention that I have some personal projects that I am also working on. I am happy to report that by the time this is published, I’ll have released a new short story called “The Returned Howl.” I hope that you enjoy it and I plan to have more out in the months to come.
Other than that, I am happy to report that after months of wanting to make a proper video, I have officially launched my YouTube channel Postcards From The Memory Tourist. For now I’m going to keep it a casual thing with an infrequent posting schedule. However, I want to post videos on topics that I am personally interested in and feel like I have something meaningful to say. I’ll suggest that I am still trying to figure out how to make videos that have a fluid motion to them. On a script level, I think that I have a lot of great ideas that shine through. However, I still need to find a visual language that makes sense.
So please, welcome to my channel a video titled “Huell Howser: A True Part of California’s Gold.” It’s a tribute to one of my favorite TV personalities and I think delves into why I find him charming. I’ll admit that some might find the framework to be a bit too tangential, but it gets at the heart of why people like him matter. Also, while I’ve mentioned that I don’t have a visual language yet, I do think the editing choices reflect parts of my sense of humor that maybe only I’ll find funny. If nothing else, you’ll get to know Huell by the end of the video.
My hope is to get another shorter, more direct video on Charles Jackson’s “The Lost Weekend” out sometime in the next month. I’m not sure what I’ll do with it, but it’s a topic that’s interested me for as long as this Huell Howser topic.
Beyond that, I am continuing to try and live a full and satisfying life. As I return to March Madness and ramp up for volleyball finals, I am hoping that things will be great in April. While I have talked about a lot of downers, there’s a lot that’s making me happy. It’s important to not lose sight of your personal joy, because it’s really all you got. As the world continues to be left in this black cloud of confusion, take some time to remember why life is worth living. Maybe that’s going for a walk or writing things out. Maybe take a few days off of social media to clear your head and remember how stupid the discourse is once you talk to people IRL. I’ve spent time at sporting events, in movie theaters, and reading books. I am in the middle of my first Margaret Atwood book “Alias Grace” and absolutely loving it.
Or, if nothing else fills you with joy, maybe one thing will. As of this publication, Godzilla x Kong (2024) has officially hit cinemas. I know it’s not going to change the world, but if it’s as good as Godzilla vs. Kong (2021), then I’ll be in hog heaven very soon here. These kaiju movies are the best. Maybe it’s not Godzilla Minus One (2023) but it still has Bryan Tyree Henry. Who can complain about that?
Anyway, that’s all that I have to say for now. Life’s been good to me. I hope that the same can be said for you. While this year hasn’t been the most encouraging, it’s still brought enough good in the world to make me recognize that parts of it are about perspective. Amid so much turmoil, never forget what you have. As hard as it can be, make sure that what matters to you continues to matter to you. Don’t lose sight of that. I’ll keep walking forward, no matter what the weather ends up being. I’ll get where I’m going eventually. It just takes putting one step in front of the other.
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