The Idiot Box

The further we progress into 2025 (and contemporary society in general), the more I find myself at odds with a core tenet that has defined how I view America. Ever since I was a child, I believed that it was every generation’s motive to make life easier for the next. To avoid unnecessary run-ins with What About-ism, I’m not talking about anything material. Faster computers are nice, but what I’m talking about is that a child enters the world with more opportunities to get a better education, have access to healthier food, or simply feel like their neighborhood is safe. There is something that I believe should be unspoken about seeing The Land of Opportunity as a place for everyone. Hell, it’s what makes America an incredible place to live.

It's been difficult to see this belief tested very often in the past decade, where two major events happened that reflected the ultimate divide. For as much as I recognize my tenet is at best “aspirational,” there was something invigorating about waking up in June 2015 and realizing that the president legalized gay marriage. Even as a teenager in the late 2000s, there was this sense of everything being a pipe dream, that LGBTQIA+ individuals were still going to be the butt of jokes, and any small gain on the state level would not necessarily translate to the neighbors. On some level, being gay was still exoticized, with genuine representation falling outside the mainstream. Anything that made it to your home was likely fulfilling the desired narrative of deviancy. To know how many people’s defense against gay marriage was, “I don’t want them sharing what they do in their bedroom,” remains alarming if, for no other reason than it ignores the hypocrisy and that there’s probably way more straight exhibitionists than queer. 

I’ll admit that it took years of knowing people my age with different identifications to actually fully process the significance of being gay. There was “the stereotype” that made it seem alien to me, an introvert who expressed themselves solely through prose. It’s easy to take for granted how much more limited the view of LGBTQIA+ was even in 2008, compared to no,w where I once foolishly believed that things were skewing so positively that I found the coming out trope in Natalie Morales’ Plan B (2021) to be a tired artifact. To me, the media reflected a more welcoming world that was going to usher in a change of mind. After all, it was diverse enough for teen movies like Crush (2022) to have the most trivial plot end with a kiss instead of a dead lover. Bottoms (2023) and Love Lies Bleeding (2024) showed that you could make a movie about chaotic, violent lesbians and have that be a good thing.  

That was my proof. That was what I needed to believe that the next generation had it better. Read the reports. Gen-Z was the most queer generation to date. Stores were participating in rainbow capitalism. We were in a semi-utopia where LGBTQIA+ may not have been top of the mountain, but were on the playing field. People could get married. They were making quality art. They were even being elected to office. At some point, they would take the baton and go further than I could imagine because, if nothing else, they didn’t have that hurdle. 

In 2008, I was 19 and my first election included California’s Prop 8, which would ban gay marriage. It passed, and almost immediately, it was met with backlash. It’s a strange predicament, especially given my home’s former reputation as a liberal mecca, but that’s where society was in 2008. It was social suicide to promote gay rights. In a move that surprised me, the 2024 election would call back to Prop 8 by saying that it needed to alter language in California law, especially if things went south. 

Anyone who was around a few years ago when The Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade will tell you that one of the smaller talking points was a justice suggesting that gay marriage should be reconsidered as well. The conversation died down to deservedly focus on the blow to women’s rights, but it has remained a concern at the back of my mind even during a period that was under Democratic leadership. How were we losing the progress? What happened to every generation having it better? Surely women deserved more than geriatric scorn. 

As any person who’s seen the Yin-Yang symbol will tell you, there is always balance. For as much as I perceive everything I mentioned as a net positive, there was always doomed to be pushback. Only this was the type that was more than raised on TV. It was the TV. It controlled the marketing of messages and knew how to brand on clothing. Even the introduction of its major candidate has become etched in stone in ways I couldn’t say for almost any other candidate. For a figure so antithetical to my beliefs, I can’t help but argue that he has vision. It transcends our conventional view of politics and plays into our morbid need for immediate stimulation, a need for retweets and shitposts to spread the foulest messages to the most innocuous of places. 

Just as everything looked to be getting better, the man rode down the escalator and into a public discussion that has lasted longer than the previous Republican president. We are officially 10 years into this era, and it’s one of the most disjointed narratives imaginable, where every day feels like a dozen distractions. Worried about incriminating yourself? Go on the roof. Send out the military. Arrest innocent civilians while trying to not remind people of that time someone asked why you slept with a copy of “Mein Kampf” by your bedside. 

The whole experience is numbing. Not to the point that I submit, but more that the past seven months have worn me down. Even the suggestion that he will now lead The Olympic Committee in 2028 has broken my heart in ways you can’t understand. The joy of this country has been sucked out just because one man needs all-encompassing control, where I’m not above thinking that the opening ceremony will be shot like a Leni Riefenstahl joint. For as much as I hate San Francisco for writing that article about canceling LA28, I can’t deny that I haven’t thought that deep down some days as I.C.E. raids populate my city and make the feeling of safety dissipate. Frankly, Los Angeles deserves The Olympics. America doesn’t. Not until it can put the toys away and have a real conversation about what its values really are.

I don’t know that we have it as good as we did even when I was in high school, when there was still that air of conservatism, and homophobia was still en vogue. I went to bed yesterday with the news that Obergefell v. Hodges was at risk of being overturned, albeit by a figure who worried about her own “religious persecution” back then as well. The historical rhymes are annoying at this point, especially as it suggests that the larger narrative has moved away from acceptance, of believing that people are a lot more complex than who they are attracted to. Sure, this isn’t new if you recount Don’t Say Gay for example, but you want to believe this is a dead end, that The Supreme Court, The Supreme Court that overturned Roe v. Wade, isn’t going to take it down this easily and return it to states' rights. Then again, as the Olympic committee bans trans athletes for LA28, it’s hard to think anything fair is in the immediate future.

Even if I don’t have any immediate stakes tied to gay marriage, there is still the reality of what it symbolizes to the general public. Marriage is still a symbol of social acceptance, as it speaks to traditions that families have had for generations. It conveys so much as far as unity goes, and I was thrilled to know in 2015 that it was legalized because it validated something that wasn’t entirely recognized at the time. Most of all, it was a chance to recognize happiness in people’s dreams of their ideal lives. It is, ostensibly, what America remains about.

At least, I hope so. This current president takes most of his cues from the TV model, and I will say it’s effective. In a fragmented age, it’s hard to not be aware of what he’s saying. I would wish not to, but he has this burden of letting you know, where even his assassination attempt becomes fodder for his larger campaign.

Even then, generations have called TV “the idiot box,” or a place to turn your brain off and forget your troubles for a few hours. To see all of this as entertainment reveals how much is not taken seriously, where a South Park episode maligning I.C.E. gets scooped up as promotional materials. Everything is designed to entertain now, and I hate it. I want boring leaders. I want just leaders. I want ones who don’t fill me with dread because they thought a jeans commercial was somehow a coded Aryan message. Also, I want the word taco back. It’s too good a word to throw away as a pedantic insult. Fuck you.

Most of all, I want a return to order, to recognize that humanity is not just some villain of the week narrative that can be manipulated with a few choice words. These are real people whose lives are being uprooted because of some baseless accusations. Watching the state of the unions now feels closer to comedy club roasting than actual confidence boosters. At moments like that, a thousand channels are on, but nothing is being said. Everyone hates each other. Come back next week for the exciting follow-up.

Going into Target this past week, I was reminded of what has been lost. It’s the middle of August, but even then, I walk down the media aisle to see if any new books grab my attention. In the wake of Target canceling Pride Month merch for beige hour, I think of the uproar of bomb threats and violent hostility thrown at a store for celebrating diversity. I think of how Ron DeSantis and his exclusionist beliefs were allowed to sell a memoir in the back without concern. This time around, I saw a new section along the back wall. There was a series of all-ages literature under the “Spiritual” banner. 

Now, in theory, nothing is wrong with this. I believe that stores should cater to diverse markets (Target continues to sell Chanukah accessories, for example). For as much as I believe that there’s been way too much abuse regarding “separation of church and state” on a federal level, I do think it’s fine to welcome people who want a good Jesus book in retail. 

However, some part of me felt bitter: a feeling I try to ignore because I recognize sourness is not a useful emotion. As I stand in a Target and think of everything that has symbolically happened here since they refused to sell me Pride Merch two years ago because it was taken off clearance, I get mad. Obergefell v. Hudson is at risk of being turned over by someone who claimed it was against her religious rights to do a legal process. Texas is trying to redistrict the state just to make the state even redder, at the president’s behest. Everything is working in favor of me never seeing another stupid rainbow in this store again, and yet I get to look at a Jesus book that I assume preaches tolerance and to “be good to one’s neighbor.” To the person buying that book, let me forewarn you that you’re not losing shit. Follow the values all you like, but don’t feed into the victim complex. 

I don’t believe California will fully collapse to this worldview. Even as signs are there, I want to believe there’s still pushback that will keep certain order in place. The 2024 election did lead to desired protections for gay marriage. However, it will be difficult to feel like everything is unified, especially as our governor currently espouses anti-trans talking points and talks on his podcast exclusively to people who don’t have the best views on LGBTQIA+ issues. It sucks, especially when he’s a figure who used to be seen as radical. But even then, I pray that the next governor election restores some faith in the system and that the values are upheld. 

But for now, I remain in disbelief with my core tenet. Does the next generation have it better? I am not a parent and do not directly influence anyone younger than me. With that caveat, I do believe that things outside of uncontrolled circumstances, such as Covid-19, have gotten substantially worse and that The American Dream I was sold in the 1990s has become harder to idealize. It’s still possible, but not without dedicating your whole life to making your every waking minute a commodity. You like to draw? Sell it. You like to read? Become a tutor. You like to hike? Walk dogs. As much as I respect individualistic drives, I hate the notion that everything needs to be looked at less as personal fulfillment and more as monetary gain. That comes from believing that the traditional system doesn’t work and, quite frankly, it hasn’t for some time. 

Maybe one day things will get better. I hope they do. However, there’s a certain disillusionment right now that prevents me from immediately understanding how that’s possible. Every day should be striving to be better than the last, and that isn’t happening. Fictional narratives about how bad it was hide how terrible the solutions are. The lies are holding back so much progress, and I think treating politics like TV is only making it more difficult for younger generations to differentiate substance from hearsay. When everything is designed to entertain, nothing is worth tuning in for. It’s about time we subscribe to a better program.